Banana Pancakes

My Big took me and her grandlittle (who went to high school with me) out for a pancake brunch today. I ordered banana pancakes and made a comment about the Jack Johnson song.



(Actually, I ordered banana pancakes because OF the Jack Johnson song. It is such an awesome song!)

But... nobody at the table seemed to know what the fuck I was talking about when I pointed at the menu and squealed, "OMG! Banana Pancakes!! Just like that Jack Johnson song!!"

Honestly, I don't know how far I can carry on a relationship with someone who either a. doesn't like Jack Johnson (which I am pretty sure is the case with these people because they are all hip hop and R&B, all the time) or b. understands a reference I make but decides to leave me hanging and looking like an idiot because of his/her inherent jerkiness.

While I was chomping on my huge plate of banana pancakes, my twin joined us because he finished his Greek/Roman history final early. He sat down and started bitching about the class:

"You know what I realized? Humanities classes really aren't that difficult... you would think that with all the papers and reading, it would be hard, but it is actually pretty easy."

Fuckyoufuckyoufuckyoufuckyou for yet another indirect insult aimed at me.

I wanted to slap him with one of my banana pancakes.

Since he hates pancakes, it would have been have doubly satisfying to do a little pancake-bitchslapping at the table.

The conversation continued:

"Did you know Karen wants to double major AND pick up a minor?"

"Why the hell would you want to do that?! You know it doesn't improve your job prospects, right?"

"..... I am actually INTERESTED in the subjects I want to study."

"Okay..."

I am so sorry for not being remotely interested in or planning on following in your get-rich-quick, Corporate-America-is-my-dream-job footsteps. How surprising is it really, given that I don't hate homeless people and fat people or think that all liberals are crazy like you do??

In my mind, the act of eating banana pancakes has always been the pinnacle of ultimate relaxation in a completely stress-free and chilled out state of mind.

Instead, I walked out of the pancake house fuming.

***

The pancakes weren't even that good; I could see the banana, but I couldn't even taste it.